I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
I was not drunk enough for that final.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
Randomize
