I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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