Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
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