toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
Those nachos came to me in a dream
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
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