remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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