Pappa wants mamma naked
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
I'm passing your future prison.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
I smell like Dick and happiness
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize
