just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
