I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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