Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
Randomize