that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
this boner is exhausting
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
