you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Randomize
