What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Randomize
