dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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