he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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