But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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