white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
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