He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
Randomize
