Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Randomize