ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Randomize
