i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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