thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
