So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
You dont lie about slip and slides
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
is that a dick in a sweater?
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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