My brain says no but my pants say off.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
