If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Randomize
