i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
