Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
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