why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Can you bring me the toilet please
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize