So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
