atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
