And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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