So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
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