I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
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