His pubic hair was longer than his dick
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
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