You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Come on in and take your pants off
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