No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
i think we sleep fucked last night...
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
