i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?'
i was like PREG?
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
