People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Randomize