the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
