I like my sex mixed with concussions.
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Randomize
