If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
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