do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
