Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
wow bdsm is so cute
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Randomize
