Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
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