Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
My dad just said "fuck circus"
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
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