you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
