Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Blow job season was short but glorious.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Randomize