What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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