McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
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