if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
Randomize
