my sisters under your porch take her home
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize